One Month In

So we made it through a month (and a day), and we are all still happy and alive. Well, mostly. Eliza is a little peeved, at times, but who can blame her? And Hazel can’t really smile yet, but if she could, I bet she would.
Hazel is, of course, still a mysterious newborn for the most part. Kevin and I like to make conjectures about her personality, but it’s all guesswork and projection. What we know so far boils down to this: she is a harder baby than her sister. She wants to be held all the time – which is equal parts delightful and challenging. She has to be enticed into sleeping. She won’t take a bottle without a fight, and you can’t fight hard enough to get her to drink formula. She will barf all over you the second you let your guard (burp cloth) down. She also makes the sweetest cooing noises, and snuggles into you in a way that makes you want to sit on the couch and stare at her for hours.
Why the butt groove on the sofa has gotten pretty pronounced
Why the butt groove on the sofa has gotten pretty pronounced
I feel more attached to her than I did to Eliza at this point. Am I allowed to say that? Is that one of those things my kid will read in twenty years and hate me for (as I narcissistically assume my kid will give two shits what I wrote on my weblog at the beginning of the century)? Well, it’s true. There are rational explanations for this – Eliza wouldn’t or couldn’t nurse, so I spent far more time with my breast pump than I did with her. Eliza preferred to be put down to sleep, both at night and during the day. Eliza was very mild from day one – she fussed a bit in the evenings, but would quiet down immediately if you walked her around a little, or swaddled her nice and tight.
Hazel requires more… finesse. She seems to have a calm and sweet temperament, but is perhaps a little less laid back (if I may make such claims about a one month old’s personality). She cries more, and with more urgency. She needs to be held and jiggled just so. She really doesn’t want us to sit down or stop walking. She wants to nurse and nurse and nurse but can’t keep the milk down, and seems distressed and uncomfortable until it comes back up (invariably right down my shirt, moments after the burp cloth shifted out of the way).
Keep walking, mom!
I will barf on you.
I’m actually thinking she might have reflux, since a lot of her fussiness etc. wasn’t evident from the get go. At first, she was utterly calm and didn’t really cry at all, though she certainly preferred to sleep on me rather than in a crib. She started getting fussier and spitting up more and wanting to be held upright more around two weeks, and it’s progressed. I think. It’s hard to say. I got a zantac Rx for her last week, but I don’t think it is helping much – though again, it’s hard to say because it’s hard to get her to take the medicine consistently (she haaaaates it). Our pediatrician was skeptical, because she is gaining weight fine, but let us try the medicine. I might ask to switch to prevacid when we go in for her one month appointment this week. I keep talking myself into and out of thinking it’s reflux, versus her just being a normal baby. (Eliza was emphatically not normal, in terms of how easy she was, a fact we were aware of all along and take no credit for – but her being abnormally easy doesn’t mean we know what normal is like.)
That aside, we are enjoying our embiggened family quite a bit. Eliza seems to be adjusting fairly well – she likes to “be nice” to her baby sister (pet her head) and point out all her little parts (“head? arm? piggies?”), and she also likes to whine like nobody’s business the second I start nursing the baby. So I’d say that’s about par for the course for a toddler. I have ALL the respect for people who can manage a newborn and a toddler all by their lonesome – I had family around helping run interference till less than a week ago, and I would have lost my mind without them. I mean, what do you do when the toddler charges you while you’re nursing the relatively fragile newborn? (Answer: push her over. Gently. Ish.)
Missed a spot, Mom.
Missed a spot, Mom.
I have more to say, but no time to say it.
We went to Seattle last weekend for a frisbee tournament, and it was great. I wish I could have played more, but my ankle is still pretty hosed and Hazel and Eliza were hard to wrangle in a giant field in the hot sun.
Nursing is going so, so much better this time around. I have a lot of thoughts on that, likely of no importance to anyone but past and future me.
I have thoughts about maternity leave – having one, this go round, and the ways that’s easier AND harder.
And oh goodness, exercise and baby weight and cookies. Yep. Maybe I’ll have time soon. I miss you, internet.
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18 Responses to One Month In

  1. Katie says:

    As someone who just recently finished pumping for a year, I am probably excessively interested in hearing about how you’re able to nurse the second time around. I think this probably comes across a little creepy, but yea.

    • snoozical says:

      Not creepy at all – I was practically rabid for anecdotes of people who had different experiences the second time! I’ll work on a post, though at this rate it’ll take a while. In the meantime, though – totally different ball game. More milk, kid is better at her end of things, I am better at my end of things, and it just… works. Still hurt like a mo for the first three weeks, though!

  2. Erica says:

    Great update and pictures. Anna was on the harder side… Fussy, needed to be held a lot, fought sleep (still does). I’m not sure we’ll get a break on #2. Anyway, I know what those babies are like. But as you know it does eventually pass. Kind of! High needs baby for us transitioned to high needs toddler and so on and so forth. But she is still tons of fun. Isn’t it a trip how kids have these personalities right from birth?

    • snoozical says:

      That’s what’s interesting to me – I can already feel myself feeling like.. defensive? About Hazel. Like when other people are like, wow, she cries a lot! I’m all, I will cut you, she’s perfect. I never had reason to feel like for E, because she was always so chill. I’d worried more about the opposite – me being like, yeah she DOES cry a lot, here take her away before I lose my mind. If that makes any sense at all.

      • Erica says:

        Ha. My Anna was also a hard baby and Ivy was pretty easy, so I had kind of the opposite thing. When people commented on how happy she was I was all “YES SEE THAT FIRST ONE WAS NOT MY FAULT THEY’RE JUST LIKE THAT.”

  3. Nimble says:

    Nursing and playing frisbee, I am impressed! Nice grumpy baby you’ve got there.

  4. Aliza says:

    My son (now 27 months) had reflux that developed gradually, and it sounds like your experience with Hazel thus far is similar to his. He was gaining weight fine, but as time went on, just became more and more miserable when he ate. MISERABLE. He’d suck at his bottle for a bit, then scream throughout his feeding. Dr. started him on Zantac, then upped the dose, but neither helped. BUT. Prevacid was a godsend. Seriously, it was like a night and day difference. We weaned him off it at a year, so he was on it about 8 or 9 months. In sum, reflux bad, Prevacid good.

  5. LizScott says:

    Oh, your girls. I just adore them.

  6. kathleenicanrah says:

    cuties, the both of them! I love the “guess the human personality in newborn form” game, and consider myself a total expert at it.

  7. Carmen says:

    There are no words to describe how much I love the photos in this post, particularly the first two. I love the yawn. And you look gorgeous AND you’re getting baby snuggles. So great.

  8. K says:

    I agree–you do look gorgeous.

  9. Miranda says:

    Well. Imagining Eliza saying “Piggies!” at her little sister’s toes has knocked me over with all the cute.

  10. HereWeGoAJen says:

    Those are the best girls. And you need another bow to cover that last spot. If I ever find more dinosaurs, I’ll send one.

  11. Anne says:

    She is so smooshy and lovely and perfect! Somehow my smooshy-lovely-perfect went and turned one on me, so I’m glad you’ve made a new smooshy-lovely-perfect for me to adore from afar.

    Simon was also a wants-to-be-held baby, though no reflux. It does get better eventually! I think we were able to stop co-sleeping around…ten months? On second thought this paragraph might not be so helpful…

    • snoozical says:

      I CANNOT believe Simon is one. And it does help to know how long it took – they are all different, and I know we got off RILLY EASY with the first baby, so on some level I think we deserve a little more trouble this go round. And it’s nice to hear other data points about how things unfold!

  12. Your girls are SO CUTE. I hope you expand on your maternity leave thoughts. It has been one of my biggest sources of angst for MONTHS and even now that I am ON it I have such conflict.

    • snoozical says:

      You! We are all waiting on TENTERHOOKS! When did you have the baby?? Do we get to see squishy baby pictures? How is it going?? How you are well!

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